Reflections from Shalem's West Coast Regional Gathering
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by Barbara Troxell & Donna Pritchard
January 24-28, 2005Mercy Center, Burlingame, CA
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Barbara Troxell's Reflection:
What a gift for me! I entered the Shalem West Coast Gathering inwardly raising the question, "What is my next call, beyond continuity of what is already present for me, in this active retirement time?" I came rather fragmented within, yet eagerly and expectantly. I returned home, driving more gently down the 400 mile stretch to southern California, ready to face a necessary surgical procedure and open to making changes towards a more contemplative way of being.
Throughout the five days, I was recalled again and again to being attentive to what is, moment by moment, and to letting go to God, knowing that I am held in love and will be guided as needed. Gifted moments and luminous aspects graced the Gathering for me. Here are some of them:
The great resonant temple bell called us into silence and out of silence, as staff spoke of "inviting the bell," rather than "ringing" or "striking" the bell. We were invited to liminal spaces as the bell was invited. Staff presented their reflections and engaged ours on contemplative grounding for life and leadership.
Tilden Edwards' evocative presentations led us into contemplative awareness, first within ourselves, then in stimulating sharing in small groups, and always with open sensitivity to the wider society and world.
My small group-participants from Jewish and Christian communities of faith, all living in southern California-was a remarkable opportunity. People I had never met before developed together into a circle of trust, care and prayer.
The silent retreat opened my own depths in a fresh and fruitful way. Especially during this time, the chanting, poetry, slow walking, and sounds and sights led me to deeper silence and prayerful knowing. One song with movement (adapted from a poem by Wendell Berry) has remained with me, almost as a mantra: "When I rise up, let me rise up, like a bird, gracefully. And when I fall, let me fall down, like a leaf, gratefully, without regret."
Insights and invitations from the Gathering were many. I came to know again that regular contemplative practice including silence, walking, chanting-often in solitude, sometimes in groups-is essential for me. I want to live more readily in the moment and to sense the wonder and delight, the suffering and pathos, the humor and quirkiness of life more vividly. I want to let my actions for peace and justice, as well as my teaching and leading.
There is much more that has emerged and grown for me from the Regional Gathering. But perhaps it is enough to say I was recalled to what is most needful: attentiveness to the Holy in all things, in all time, in all places. For the wonderful staff, the participants who interacted in a great circle of trust, and for fresh awareness of God's love in all that is, I say, thanks be to God!
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Donna Pritchard's Reflection:
"Homecoming"-that was the word going through my mind during Shalem's West Coast Gathering. I had never actually been to the Mercy Center, had never met most of the participants and had never been introduced to the majority of the leaders. I also had to drive three hours to take a two-hour flight, then catch a taxi to the center. Still, I felt like I was "coming home" all week.
In some very real ways, every Shalem experience enables us to come home-to our truest selves, that part of our souls which knows and appreciates the presence of God in every moment. Gerald May, in The Awakened Heart speaks about the spiritual life as a "series of homecomings"-coming home to the present moment, coming home to the desire for love and ultimately, coming home to God.
In this understanding, living the spiritual life means risking the honest experience of home-sickness, feeling its pain and allowing that to nudge us back into awareness of God. Again, in May's words, "Each noticing [of God's presence] points us homeward.... God, who is our true home, knows right where we are."
The power of gathering with fellow pilgrims who are trying to find the way home cannot be underestimated. There is a beautiful synergy created in silence that is heavy with homesickness and tinged with hope. In our Gathering we glimpsed the truth of homecoming that Mary Oliver paints in her poem,
"Wild Geese":
"You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
Love what it loves."
Thank you, my brothers and sisters, who remind me to "let the soft animal of my body"-and even at times the hardness of my heart-"love what it loves," on the way toward home.
© 2008 The Shalem Institute.