by Connie Clark

The following is an excerpt of comments given by Connie Clark at Shalem's book-signing party for Holy Meeting Ground.

I'm so happy to be here tonight, and to have this book here, because creating it was an impossible job. Now that it actually exists, I have even more evidence that God can and will do just about anything.

The idea for this book was born in a committee meeting here at Shalem. For some reason, I mentioned that I had written a number of books about non-profit organizations, and that these books were used as fund-raising and public relations tools. I threw that out without a thought that Shalem would even want such a book.

Next thing you know, I'm writing a proposal for this project--a book, part anthology and part original narrative, to celebrate Shalem's 20th anniversary. Sometimes things move slowly at Shalem. Sometimes they move with blinding speed. The book concept tore through the place. My head was spinning. I was thrilled and excited. But secretly I was scared. As usual, I had "gone for it"--plunging in and saying, "sure, I can do that, and I want to!" The morning-after's in my life are the frightened follow-ups to this impetuousness.

Well, creating this book was one long morning-after. "How in the world will I ever do this?" became my constant refrain. But I set out to do 30 interviews with people who have been important to Shalem throughout its history. Immediately I knew this project would be really different. With the previous books, I'd always run into at least one or two people with heavy agendas about the organization or their part in the book. I learned how to deal with them and I was prepared to do that with Shalem people too. But I never needed to.

Interviewing Shalemites was a great experience--an honor. I wish more of the material from those interviews was in the book. I want to share with you just a few quick quotes that didn't make it into the book but will give you an idea of how much richness I encountered.

RHODA NARY: "I think of Shalem people as journeying on a pilgrimage together--and not sure where--but wanting to take it because the desire is great. And we help each other with that desire. We help each other keep the desire strong--not squashing it. And we accept wherever the other is. It's an acceptance that doesn't smother, doesn't take care of, doesn't try to pull you into anything but your own journey."

DICK LAWRENCE: Speaking about how contemplative prayer has changed his worship and spiritual life: "I really look forward to the Eucharist now and I essentially am in contemplative prayer as all of the three or four hundred people file up for communion and I find it doesn't make any difference to me whether it's ten minutes or 15 minutes, the time is just marvelous. I used to be impatient with communion. ... Now I think I'm listening in a different way than I used to. I almost always have my eyes closed during all these experiences."

ED BAUMAN: "When we think of contemplative prayer we often think we're in a nice chapel or some quiet, beautiful place, and it's very silent and you're moving into that peaceful thing. But there's another dimension now I understand to contemplative. [In my prayer recently] I wasn't asking God to do anything. It wasn't a petition--it wasn't that sort of thing at all. It was just being with God, but it was being with God in the pain that I was experiencing."

RAY DUNGAN: "At Shalem, the Holy Spirit is working--there's no ifs, ands or buts. One thing I've also learned is that there are no exact answers. Unfortunately, I have an accounting background."

JUNE DAVIS: "I have a little grand-daughter and she used to use the expression 'need it.' When she wants a peanut butter sandwich, she says, 'need it.' We were very touched as we went out to visit them and we left after four days and they were taking us to the airport. Her mother was explaining to her that grandma and granddad were going home and she said, 'Need 'em.' It's very concise. Shalem is growing--there's an unseen strong quality of Shalem in vibrations going all over the place--they are good and people do 'need 'em.' "

Then there were 20 years' worth of Shalem News to be gone through. Try picking out a relative handful of articles from this wonderful publication and you will see why my whole house was littered with copies of articles, notes scrawled across the top, index cards in the bathroom ... it was a mess. An embarrassment of riches.

My mother died in March 1993, when I was supposed to deliver the finished manuscript. The book was very late. I would love to say it was all because of Mom's illness and death and my grief, but it wasn't. I looked back at my interview notes from Marcia Brewington and she had told me, "Well, I'll tell you what works with me. Get the first sentence." It took me a long time, but when I got that first sentence, I was off and running.

Putting this book together taught me a lot. Just the exposure to Shalem and its people--what could be better? I also learned that I needed to give up my image of what writing should be like. I should be in a quiet cottage in the woods, peacefully writing for a couple of hours, then going out for a walk, then editing for a while. I should be deeply into it. I should feel good.

Well, I'm learning that any time you build up an image like that, it gets knocked right down. It wasn't peaceful. It wasn't in a cottage in the woods. It was interrupted by numerous phone calls and minor crises. It was confusing. I was ashamed of myself for being so late with it. It didn't feel prayerful at all.

But guess what? And here's the great learning for me from Shalem to date: it might not have felt like God was in it, but God was in it. Inescapably, tenderly, generously. I am grateful for this experience. I hope this little book will tell Shalem's story and spread the light we share here a little farther. It has already done its transforming work with me.